-On Wednesday, I was with a class of 1st graders. In the afternoon, they were becoming particularly unruly and I had to start using my "mean voice." Apparently this voice is a fair bit more intense for 6 year-olds than it is for the 10 or 11 year-olds I work with most of the time. After one stern admonishment to be quiet while the teacher is giving a lesson, one girl named Daija raised here hand immediately afterwards. With great trepidation she said, "Mr. Scott...When you said that your voice was really loud." My response was, "If you children would be more quiet I wouldn't have to be so loud." For the rest of the day, every time I raised my voice, Daija would immediately cup her hands over her ears.
-On Friday, I was working with a class of 3rd graders. One boy named Carlos approached me at my desk and asked, "Mr. Scott, may I go get some aqua?" "Aqua, huh?" I replied. "Yeah, sometimes I speak Spanish. I'm half Mexican. Alan uses Spanish words sometimes too. He's also half Mexican."
In the same class, a kid named Noah (who apparently has a ridiculous amount of access to automatic weapons and other highly deadly firearms) asked, "Do you have any kids, Mr. Scott?" "Nope, no kids." "We are you at least married?" I showed him my ring-free left hand. "Nope, no wife either." His response made me laugh out loud: "Maaaaaan, you need to get married." Apparently a girl in the class named Jessica also thought I needed a female companion. She kept asking if she could walk next to me in the halls and when we went out to the buses she put her hand in the bend of my arm like we were prom dates or something. Before another teacher saw this and mistook me for a sexual predator I had to say, "Excuse me, Jessica but I need to be at the front of the line so I can make sure everyone's behaving."
-On Monday I was with a 5th grade class. Our last order of business for the day was to read an issue of Time Magazine for Kids as a group. One article was about Pope Benedict XVI praying in a mosque in Istanbul and meeting with several of the local Muslim leaders. As I attempted to explain the full historical significance of the head of Catholic Church a) praying in a mosque that b) is in Istanbul, I realized these kids couldn't have cared less about what I was telling them. But then a girl named Amberly raised her hand. "Finally! Student interest!" I thought. "Yes, Amberly. You have a question about this article?" "Yah, I do. What's a muslim?" What I wanted to say in the moment was, "Are you fucking kidding me?" Instead, I did my best to explain that it was another religion that many people in the world practice as they worship God and try to show love to other people.
Those are the past week's highlights.
2 comments:
I can only imagine the reaction that Daija would have had to the late night explosion soph. year when our upstairs neighbors were working on their bikes. I'm pretty sure that's the origin of my first gray hair.
It's funny to think in this post-911 era that someone would not at least recognize the word "muslim." Although if those are 5th graders, that would place them in kindergarten when the event happened. Hopefully you took full advantage of this "teachable moment."
ok, so the sentence directed at me made me laugh because already I was thinking, "gee, there are typos all over the place!"
You need to go to my blog and see the post "The Best Christmas Gift Ever." You'll love it.
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